Stewardship 101: Thank you (Ezine Ready)

Stewardship 101: Thank you (Ezine Ready)

Thanks.

Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough.-- Oprah Winfrey

• Grocery List: milk, turkey burgers, cheese, bread, raisins
• Darynn Dance School--6 pm
• Complete strategic plan

Sometimes I move so quickly thoughout the day, checking off the items on my TO DO lists, that I forget to be thankful. While it may seem that I never have enough, I am so fortunate.

• I have a wonderful husband, my best friend of 15 years.
• I have a fabulous daughter who makes me smile everyday.
• My extended family are a source of inspiration and support.
• I have an interesting career that I love (most days!).
• All of my needs are met and many of my wants.

With all of these things to be thankful for, how can I ever forget to say "Thank You".

Dear Lord,

Thank you for providing me with a roof over my head and clothes on my back. Thank you for my family. They provide me with so much love--I hope they feel the love I have for them. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Amen.

Home

While holed up during a surprise six-day vacation with snow all around us, we sat as a family transfixed by the harsh images portrayed in the epic movie Roots. Having purchased the boxed set many years ago, this was the first time we shared it with our eight-year-old daughter. As I do each time I view it...I saw it for the very first time...I struggled with Fanta and I cried with Kizzy and I felt the awesome rush of freedom with Chicken George and his sons. But this time more than ever I empathized with Mammy Belle, the devoted wife of "the old African", Kunta Kinte.

When I was first married nearly 15 years ago, my husband and I were watching some movie on TV where the gangsters were forced to leave everything they knew...their homes, their families and their friends to either go into hiding or enter the Witness Protection Program. My husband is fairly quiet and using words extremely sparingly, he said to me the thing that I most treasure....more than, "I love you"...more than, "You are beautiful" (although those things are always great to hear!!!!!)... he turned to me and said, "as long as I am with you, I am home". Wow! How awesome is that? I still get a little choked up when I think of it. More incredibly, I asked him recently if he still felt that way and after such a long time together...he DOES...and so do I!

In Roots, Kunta Kinte even after he jumped the broom with the woman he loved, he still listened for the drum, he still looked for freedom, and tried to find his way back to Africa. While I have never been a slave, (Thank God!) in his constant discontent, wasn't he further enslaving himself? and moreover enslaving his family--as they never knew if today was the day that they would wake up and he would be gone? Did he not find "home" in the love of his wife and his child? While trite, isn't home where your heart is?

Dear Lord, May home for my family always be more than just a physical structure, but a place that provides love and security. Let us know that in one another we are home. Let us not look outside of each others' arms to find comfort and support. Let us create a home that is a strong and solid foundation that is built to last. Let us model it after your example. In your name I pray. Amen.

Valentine's Day Trap

As I busy myself shopping for my Valentine's Day gifts for my two sweethearts, my husband and my daughter, I criticize myself as I do every year for allowing myself to fall into "the trap".

Valentine's Day is the card makers, the post office, and florists' dream! Not including the little cards our kids exchange in their classrooms, over 188 million cards are purchased and sent on Valentine's Day. But what does it really mean?

Is Valentine's Day the day we show our loved ones that we love them? Is it the day we romance our significant other? Is it the day we drag out our sexiest negligee and prepare for a wild night of 'unbridled passion' (LOL--can't believe I just used that phrase!)? Aren't those things that we should be doing everyday? Aren't those the things that contribute to creating a strong relationship? Shouldn't you cuddle your children every moment of everyday? Shouldn't you ensure that romance and wild nights of passion are regular components of your relationship with your significant other? And above all else, shouldn't you always, always show the ones you love that you love them with your words and with your acts... everyday?

And while I believe in my heart that these things are true...And I know on my hips that chocolate is the last thing I need...Here I am purchasing Valentine's Day gifts for my two sweethearts, so that they know that I love them and I am certain that I will do the same next year. But I hope that they do not question my love the other 364 days of the year.

Dear Lord, teach me to love as You loved. Ensure that my family and friends know that they are special in my life. Help me to show them that they are loved. Even when we argue and disagree, let us do so lovingly, without ugly words or temperaments. Help us to love another as you love us. AMEN.

Just American

When will we, as Americans, be "Just Americans" without the various disclaimers that we place before the title that we presumably hold so dear? I have thought of this often and, sadly, have come up with far more questions than answers.

1. Are there African Italians or Irish Chinese persons? Or is it only in America, the Melting Pot, that we separate ourselves with disclaimers stating our nation of origin?
2. How many generations removed does one need to be before their disclaimer becomes null? For instance, while I prefer the term Black American, I am what others may refer to as an African American woman. I have never been to Africa. I have not traced my ancestry back to Africa. I am certain, by the beautiful bronze of my skin, that I have ancestors who hail from the motherland, I feel no connection to Africa.
3. As a Christian who believes the cradle of civilization is Egypt, are we not all African Americans?
4. Do we discount the heritages of our other ancestors and choose the most prevalent? Do we ignore them all and go with something generic such as "Multiracial"? Or do we string them all out into one extremely long inclusive sentence?
5. Do these disclaimers seek to remind us of where we have come from or do they stand in the way of where we could possibly go? Do they act as a means of showing our pride or a way to continually separate us?

I have no answers, but anyone who knows me is aware that I have lots of opinions! I am a proud woman of color. I am a beautiful combination of races. I am American in its truest sense of the word!

Dear Lord, teach me to love people for what they are on the inside and care less about what they look like on the outside. Help me to see them as a unique reflection of you. Through your example let us create a world of mutual respect and understanding. Let us be reminded daily that we were all created in your image and because of that we are perfection. Amen.

Bad Words

Have you ever wondered how a bad word became a bad word? Did our founding fathers sit down with a list and go one by one and decide this is a "bad" word? The meaning of the word apparently did not factor into the choosing of the words. How did they choose one synonym over another? Why is S-H-_-T the "bad" one and defecate, number 2, BM, stinky, or doo-doo are not? If the criterion is that the word must be 4 letters, why did poop not make the naughty list? I have never really understood the concept of "bad" words.

I grew up in a household where my mother never used a "bad" word. I have heard her use what is termed as profane language twice in my life and both times she was quoting someone else--and both times I called my sister immediately to report that mom had said a "bad" word! Well, I heard her one other time, we were playing Boggle and in an effort to win she did record a four-letter word but when it came time to read her list she mispronounced it so badly that no one can ever accused her of saying that particular word! My father did throw around the occasional "bad" word, but never those that would be termed as the really, really "bad" ones...you know the "b-word" or the "f-bomb" or never the two words pertaining to a female's genitalia (one of which is the word that my mother failed so miserably in pronouncing!).

I, on the other hand, have been known to use a... few.... "bad" words, but I can honestly say I have never cursed anyone. I think "damning someone" is so much worse than using an arbitrary synonym for normal, everyday bodily functions for which we have no idea why or how they became "bad". I also very rarely make statements that begin with the phrase, "I don't mean to offend you..." because you are probably going to offend. I don't tell people that I hate them. I don't utter to others that they are stupid or ugly or unwanted or any other words designed to hurt. I don't shout the "n-word" or other derogatory statements based on a person's race or ethnicity. I do not condone war or evil; bigotry or violence. I do not, or try not to, do any of these things...but I do use "bad" words.

Again, I ask...what is a "bad" word? Does a "bad" word hurt? Or is it simply a group of letters that are synonymous for another word that we use everyday that someone somewhere has deemed as "bad"? I am not certain what makes a "bad" word, but I am certain what make words bad. If your words hurt others or cause negativity, they are bad. If they hurt no one...and feel kinda good when you say them (because when you stub your toe or a driver cuts you off, nothing feels quite as good as the f-bomb--even if you only think it--REALLY LOUDLY!!!!) then they are not so bad!

Dear Lord, as I go about my daily activities help me to remember others feelings. Let me not say anything that would cause anyone harm or hurt their feelings. Let my words truly demonstrate that I am a child of God. Let my words be loving and kind. Teach me to slow down and not simply blurt out the very first thing that pops into my head, let me think carefully about how my words will be perceived by others--how what I say today will affect someone else's tomorrow. Let me also be mindful of how I interpret another's words to me. Let me not take every unkind word to heart, as I cannot be a barometer for another's tongue, only a monitor for what I allow in and what I push right by. Lord, let me always try to live as you lived and love as you loved. AMEN

Patience

Almost everyday for the past 10 or 15 years, I have prayed to God for patience, but either He has yet to answer this particular prayer of mine or I haven't slowed down long enough to hear Him.


I am not certain if I am moving too fast or if other people just move too slow.

• Is a speed limit of 65 mph really fast enough when you are trying to get somewhere? And if you are going 65 mph, must you do it in the fast lane or can you potentially stay to the right so that I can pass?
• Do you really have to state and re-state your point, sprinkled with three-syllable SAT words, when, although I understand your really BIG words, I really just want you to get to the point?
• Must we really meet to decide when the meeting will be or wouldn't our time be best spent meeting to come up with a plan of attack?
• With new technologies, do we have to have face-to-face interaction to set our calendars or can we share calendars on-line and work to resolve any conflicts?
• Do we really have to wait for someone to ask us to do something that we know needs to be done or wouldn't it prove more expeditious if everyone looked around at what needed to be done and just did it?
• Must we restate what occurred so far at a meeting when someone is late or can they just listen quietly and get caught up or next time come on time?

I know that there are times that I am impatient. My daughter didn't even learn to put on her own socks until she was 4 or 5 because it took her entirely too long--according to me! Then I figured I better let her try, I wouldn't want her changing in gym class and not have a clue about what to do with her socks--she still doesn't get those heels in exactly the right spot, but if she's comfortable, who am I to complain?

But there are also times when people just move entirely too slow and fail to embrace technologies that will assist us all in moving faster! But regardless, I guess I need to realize that I can't change them and I guess I need to continue to pray for patience.

Dear Lord, please help me to be more patient. Help me to slow down and enjoy the journey, not just the destination. Even when people do things differently than I, let me learn from them. Let me be a positive force that may inspire others to change and challenge themselves to step outside of their comfort zone. Lord, let me be still enough to hear you, if indeed you are guiding me to be more patient and I am failing to hear you. Let me be reminded that You took Your time in the creation of the magnificence I see all around me. And let me be further reminded that even You rested. AMEN.